A guide to surviving the workplace crush

A guide to surviving the workplace crushA guide to surviving the workplace crushThe only time I was actually excited to go to my old job was when I knew my work crush was going to be there. It was a retail job at a shoe store - leid a typical 9-5 - so I didnt see him everyday. But when we did work the same shiftsoh boy.My mood was totally different on those days. I was excited to go to work and even happy to be at the store. I had a pep (or, um, maybe a sexy strut?) in my step. There was something to think about other than how boring and miserable work was. Finally, I had a reason to go to work.Being in a better mood on the job also made me put in extra effort. It was a win win I got to enjoy flirting throughout my shift while also killing it on sales.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moraWorkplace crushes are normalIm hardly the only person to experience the workplace crush phenomen on. Fifty-eight percent ofrecent survey participantsreported engaging in a workplace romance in some capacity. A psychological study aptly titled,Workplace Romances Going to Work Is Amazing and Really Funfound that participants involved in a workplace romance expressed their pleasure in going to work and were also motivated to work harder.Despite the fun factor and possible productivity boosting effects of a workplace crush, this type of relationship is still considered pretty scandalous. Of the 58% of aforementioned survey participants, 64% kept it mostly secret due to the risky nature of the relationship. Company policies vary when it comes to a workplace romance. Even if such relationships are allowed, employees may fear gossip or judgement from peers and higher-ups.Navigating your workplace crushWhether your crush is brand new orturning into something serious, here are our five tips for surviving the workplace crush.1. Know your companys policySome companies are more lax than ot hers with policies surrounding employees dating. HR and management might be okay with it in certain situations - like if youre in totally different departments. However, if theres a power dynamic - if your boss is your crush, or youre the boss with a crush on a direct report - HR probably wont be cool with it.Your organization might require that you tell your direct managers and HR if youactually start dating your crush, or you might face consequences. I recommend whipping out that employee handbook you probably ignored during onboarding to get some concrete answers.2. Decide if you actually want to pursue your crushYou are in control of your actions. As you may remember from elementary school days, itispossible to have a crush without acting on it. You can bask in the good feelings and butterflies you get from your work crush without having to act on it physically or to even disclose how you feel.Talkspace therapist Rachel ONeill, Ph.D. says, Dating a workplace crush can carry s ome serious ramifications (like loss of employment). It might be helpful to consider whether pursuing the crush is worth the potential fallout. If you do decide to pursue something, you might want to consider how to be proactive in an effort to minimize potential consequences. Do you think this is just a case of casual sexual attraction, or could this be the real deal? Know your motives - and your crushs motives - before going all in.3. Think aheadWhile your dating style outside of work may be more carpe diem, you have to be a little more mindful with workplace crushes. Put some thought in and plan ahead. You might want to ask yourselfWhat if you hook up and its weird?Will you be able to do your work without feeling painfully awkward?If you end up dating for a while and then break up, will you be able to remain professional in the workplace after the split?If you and your colleague-crush end up getting serious, will you be able to stay in your current jobs?Would you be okay switch ing departments if HR required it?Its not necessarily fun to think about these things, but its important to weigh the pros and cons to decide how youd handle various possible outcomes.4. Create boundariesIf you want to play it safe, create boundaries. For example, if you feel like yourphysical chemistry is too intenseto be left alone together in a room, dont allow that to happen.ONeill says I recommend working to put into place some boundaries to minimize the contact youre having with the person. For example, if you routinely enjoy lunch breaks with this person, try including another co-worker or using lunchtime to catch up on some reading. Having a buffer can help when youre trying to resist temptations. If youre already in too deep and actively pursuing a relationship with your crush, create boundaries surrounding flirting and physical contact in the office.5. Keep it professionalUnfortunately, the main purpose of work is getting work done, not flirting. Keeping it professional in the workplace can differ depending on the workplace - not oversharing details of the crush/relationship with your coworkers, not engaging in PDA, and making sure you arent too distracted to actually get your work done. Again, reference your companys policies for more rules regarding appropriate behavior. Staying professional will ensure that you wont face consequences.Honestly, life is short. We spend most of our time on this planet working, so we might as well have a little bit of fun. Having a crush make us feelgood- and in this case, makes us dread work less. Is thatreallysuch a bad thing? Whether youre pursuing something more with your crush or simply just letting yourself feel all the feelings, you can still revel in the pleasure of crushing.This article originally appeared on Talkspace.